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When I was a young tyke of 7 or so, I received a bull rope for my birthday. That was an appropriate gift since I lived in southwestern Idaho, wore cowboy boots, and owned a belt buckle with a bucking horse on it.
My first attempt at using it occurred at the annual Grand View Rodeo. In the same chutes the big cowboys used, we miniature cowboys were put on the backs of sturdy calves.
As I settled my rear end on the back of my calf, this grizzled old cowboy helped me bind my fist with my bull rope. He spit some tobacco juice before growling, “Son, keep yourself square in the calf’s back and squeeze your legs. You got to become one with the calf.”
That was my first experience with the math equation: 1 + 1 = 1. That particular ride didn’t go well as I was thrown skyward two jumps into my ride, followed by a face plant in the Idaho dirt. 1 + 1 = -1 explained my short ride in mathematical terms.
I was much older when I discovered the best demonstration of 1 + 1 = 1. This happened when I read Genesis 2:23-24: “The man said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.”
It's pure simplicity: One man plus one woman equals one person. That’s the mathematical formula, but how does it become living and breathing?
I will start with a bold statement: April and I have a perfect marriage. That statement raised eyebrows and caused murmurs of ‘Liar!’ Hopefully, no animals were injured in the making of that sentence.
Having a perfect marriage doesn’t mean there won’t be arguments. It doesn’t mean there won’t be silent treatments. It doesn’t mean there won’t be a lonely night or two on the couch. It simply means the mathematical equation of 1 + 1 = 1 will never be broken.
Mark 10:9 declares it clearly: “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” April and I have a perfect marriage because it will always exist in its purest form until one of us leaves this earth for our final home.
Can a perfect marriage become more perfect? The meaning of the word ‘perfect’ says ‘no.’ However, can a perfect marriage become an enriched and perfect marriage? As usual God’s Word provides the powerful recipe in creating a thoroughly enriched marriage: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.” (Ephesians 5:25-27)
Just as Christ possesses and loves the church as His bride, the husband possesses and loves his wife as his bride. With that, he gives his wife the most wonderful gift he could ever give her: Himself.
The giving of himself satisfies the command of verse 25: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her…” This isn’t about giving her everything she wants. It’s about the giving of himself, and that’s a big difference. It means meeting her needs regardless of the cost to him.
Next, let’s pay attention to the results described in the following verses. She becomes sanctified and cleansed. She shines gloriously. She is holy and blameless. In order for her to possess those qualities, she only needs her husband to love her selflessly.
A perfect marriage simply means each ‘1’ is committed to the other ‘1’ in order that the sum of them together is always ‘1.’ Following, the mathematical formula for the enriching part is 1 + 1 = 1 > 1,000,000,000. In other words, no richer life exists than the marriage of selflessness given to each other.