The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.
Greetings ta ever one in western Illinois and all readers of "The Quill".
Here we are in the last week of January. Groundhog day is a few days away (February 2) and I'm concerned all this snow and cold weather could confuse his forecasting. Most forward think'n animals that come ta my mind wouldn't venture out their warm hole just ta let a few humans know what the future holds fer the weather.
Eagle Eggs vs. Baby Killing
Speak'n of wildlife, I'm told if'n ya destroy a Bald Eagle egg ya go ta prison fer an extended period of time and ya pay huge fines. However, in New York ya can kill a baby as it comes outa the womb, call it full term abortion and get monetarily rewarded fer it. Go figure?
Socialism in the USA
That line of think'n confuses me. I am also confused by those same sort of fella who are now promote'n socialism in the USA. There are certain conundrums of socialism in the USA that are difficult ta figure out:
Free people are not equal. Equal people are not free. (Think this one over and it definitely makes sense!)
The definition of the word Conundrum is: "something that is puzzling or confusing."
Here are six Conundrums of socialism in the United States of America
1. America is capitalist and greedy - yet half of the population is subsidized.
2. Half of the population is subsidized - yet they think they are victims.
3. They think they are victims - yet their representatives run the government.
4. Their representatives run the government - yet the poor keep getting poorer.
5. The poor keep getting poorer - yet they have things that people in other countries only dream about. Free cell phones, etc.
6. They have things that people in other countries only dream about - yet they want America to be more like those other countries.
Think about it! And that, my friends, pretty much sums up the USA in the 21st Century.
These three, short sentences tell you a lot about the direction of our government for the past years and cultural environment it has created:
1. We are advised to NOT judge ALL Muslims by the actions of a few lunatics, but we are encouraged to judge ALL gun owners by the actions of a few lunatics.
Funny how that works. And here's another one worth considering.
2. Seems we constantly hear about how Social Security is going to run out of money. But we never hear about welfare or food stamps running out of money!
What's interesting is the first group "worked for" their money, but the second did not!
Think about it... and last, but not least;
3. Prior to Trump we were cutting benefits for our veterans, no pay raises for our military and cutting our Marines, Army, Navy, Air Force and Coast Guard to a level lower than before WWII, but we were not stopping any of the payments or benefits to illegal aliens.
Are you among the few who are not missing something?
"If you do not take an interest in the affairs of your government, then you are doomed to live under the rule of fools." -Plato
Whilst I am on confusion and conundrums, here is some more food fer thought:
Confusion
Are you confused?
Are they confused?
Are our media confused?
Are our politicians confused?
IF WE COULD JUST FIGURE OUT WHO'S CAUSING THE PROBLEM.
Let us see. Do I understand this thing correctly?
The Shoe Bomber was a Muslim
The Beltway Snipers were Muslims
The Fort Hood Shooter was a Muslim
The underwear Bomber was a Muslim
The U.S.S. Cole Bombers were Muslims
The Madrid Train Bombers were Muslims
The Bafi Nightclub Bombers were Muslims
The London Subway Bombers were Muslims
The Moscow Theater Attackers were Muslims
The Boston Marathon Bombers were Muslims
The Pan-Am flight #93 Bombers were Muslims
The Air France Entebbe Hijackers were Muslims
The Iranian Embassy Takeover, was by Muslims
The Beirut U.S. Embassy Bombers were Muslims
The Libyan U.S. Embassy Attack was by Muslims
The Buenos Aires Suicide Bombers were Muslims
The Israeli Olympic Team Attackers were Muslims
The Kenyan U.S. Embassy Bombers were Muslims
The Saudi, Khobar Towers Bombers were Muslims
The Beirut Marine Barracks Bombers were Muslims
The Besian Russian School Attackers were Muslims
The first World Trade Center Bombers were Muslims
The Bombay and Mumbai India Attackers were Muslims
The Achille Lauro Cruise Ship Hijackers were Muslims
The September 11th, 2001 Airline Hijackers were Muslims
Buddhists living with Hindus = No Problem
Hindus living with Christians = No problem
Hindus living with Jews = No Problem
Christians living with Shintos = No Problem
Shintos living with Confucians = No Problem
Confucians living with Baha'is = No Problem
Baha'is living with Jews = No Problem
Jews living with Atheists = No Problem
Atheists living with Buddhists = No Problem
Buddhists living with Sikhs = No Problem
Sikhs living with Hindus = No Problem
Hindus living with Baha'is = No Problem
Baha'is living with Christians = No Problem
Christians living with Jews = No Problem
Jews living with Buddhists = No Problem
Buddhists living with Shintos = No Problem
Shintos living with Atheists = No Problem
Atheists living with Confucians = No Problem
Confucians living with Hindus = No Problem
Muslims living with Hindus = Problem
Muslims living with Buddhists = Problem
Muslims living with Christians = Problem
Muslims living with Jews = Problem
Muslims living with Sikhs = Problem
Muslims living with Baha'is = Problem
Muslims living with Shintos = Problem
Muslims living with Atheists = Problem
MUSLIMS LIVING WITH MUSLIMS = BIG PROBLEM
They're not happy in Gaza
They're not happy in Egypt
They're not happy in Libya
They're not happy in Morocco
They're not happy in Iran
They're not happy in Iraq
They're not happy in Yemen
They're not happy in Afghanistan
They're not happy in Pakistan
They're not happy in Syria
They're not happy in Lebanon
They're not happy in Nigeria
They're not happy in Kenya
They're not happy in Sudan
SO, WHERE ARE THEY HAPPY?
They're happy in Australia
They're happy in England
They're happy in Belgium
They're happy in France
They're happy in Italy
They're happy in Germany
They're happy in Sweden
They're happy in the USA and Canada
They're happy in Norway and India
They're happy in almost every country that is not Islamic!
And who do they blame?
Not Islam
Not their leadership
Not themselves
THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN!! AND THEY WANT TO CHANGE THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN, TO BE LIKE THE COUNTRIES THEY CAME FROM, WHERE THEY WERE UNHAPPY!
I'm completely stumped.
The Farmer And The Pheasant
A big city lawyer went Pheasant hunting in Western Illinois. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field
As the lawyer climbed over the fence to claim his bird, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.
The litigator responded, "I shot a pheasant and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."
The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in Washington, D.C. and, if you don't let me retrieve that bird, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes here in Western Illinois. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"
The lawyer asked. "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"
The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first.
I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and, being the person he was, decided that he could easily take the old codger, after all he was a box'n champion at Harvard University. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.
His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!
His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.
The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet.
Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old geezer. Now, it's my turn."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the Pheasant."
Well there ya have it then. After all that confusion, this week's column will end on that certainty.
Hope'n ta see ya in the church of yer choice this week.
Wherever ya are, whatever ya be a do'n, 'BE A GOOD ONE!'
Keep on Smile'n
Catch ya later
Barnyard Bruke