The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.



The Wisdom of Barnyard Bruke: BIRDS-NEARING HARVEST-IL STATE FAIR-FARM FUTURE-TECH SUPPORT IN MARRIAGE-NEW SOFTWARE FER WOMEN

Greetings ta ever one in western Illinois and all readers of "The Quill".

BIRDS

The barnswallow, with it's second nesting on the front porch, has four (4), bustling, well feathered, young'n about ready ta leave their nest. It is fun once again watch'n the parent fly in and poke a bug into the young ones wide open beak as quick as a blink of an eye.

I'm glad ta see "em fed so well fer its one less bug we have to contend with in our yard. The other morning I watched as a sparrow tried ta conquer a big ole black bug bigger than the size of it's beak.

As the bug squirmed it wiggled loose from the clutches of the bird's beak. The bug then tried to scurry away but the bird quickly would lunge at it with it's beak and shake it's head.

Over and over the drama transpired and ya began ta wonder who was a gonna win the contest fer life. Finally the bird seemed ta hit the right spot. Off it flew ta it's nest fer it's young'n nourishment with the huge motionless black bug in it's beak. I wondered if'n the bug was almost too big ta fit in the little ones mouth that was about ta be fed.

As we get closer and closer ta fall I enjoy the bird's activities and the call of the locusts (cicadia) more and more, know'n full well that "act" of nature's cycle will soon be over.

Some of them little fellers will head south, some will just quiet down, and the locust will lay their eggs and go under ground fer severn (7) years or so. The whole cycle repeats itself on a regular basis.

Near'n Harvest

Some corn fields around these parts are a turn'n fast. Some farmers are a predicting they will be pick'n corn in two (2) weeks.

Illinois State Fair

At the Illinois State Fair again this year there was displays of old and new farming equipment from 60s ta present. What once cost $4,000 fer harvesting is now cost'n $715,000.

Quite a contrast and food fer thought.

There was an obvious comfort contrast fer the operators of that equipment in years ago with no cabs, until now with comfortable climate controlled relatively dust free cabs that can drive themselves guided by GPS signals.

Farm'n Future

L. Tombaugh called the other day ta sell a set up fer operate'n a chase cart ta the combine in no need of a driver. It is controlled from the combine ta the semi-trailer. It cost $38,000 ta install with a $5,000 annual fee. It replaces labor with capital in those days of short labor supply.

It does not require social security payments, health insurance, workman's comp, or other such labor related expenses. It doesn't grumble or growl about long hours in the work day and is not in need of a potty and/or food break.

Of course, the operator in the combine has a rigid schedule and under considerable more pressure.

It will be enterest'n watch'n ta see where all this leads ta. Maybe machinery sometime in the future will be operated from the comfort of someone's office much like drones deliver bombs precisional into the Middle East each by a computer operator in Oklahoma well outa danger.

I'm not sure thats the agriculture of the future I'm looking forward ta. But then again maybe I'm just an "ole Drone" who has lived past his time.

Speak'n of that, don't ferget the "Olde Tyme" farm show this come'n weekend, August 24th and 25th in Stronghurst. It will be lots of fun, I'm sure!

Tech Support In Marriage New Software Fer Women

Write'n earlier about modern technology here's a good one fer ya:

Tech Support In Marriage

"The young woman who submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship to her husband) presumably did it as a joke.

Then, she got a reply that was way too good to keep to herself. The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!"

"the query:"

"Dear Tech Support,"

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry apps, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed un-desirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

"Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail."

What can I do? "signed, Desperate"

"The response (that came weeks later out of the blue)"

"Dear Desperate,"

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5."

"However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta version. Whatever you do, Do NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources."

"In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0."

"Good Luck!"

There ya have it then, that's all fer this week's column. I'm a hope'n it brings ya some good cheer.

Have a good rest of the week and see ya at "The Olde Tyme Farm Show."

See ya in church later this week as well.

Remember, wherever ya are, whatever ya be a do'n "BE A GOOD ONE!'

Keep on Smile'n

Catch ya later

Barnyard Bruke