The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.

The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "All Things Must Come To An End, A Great Reminder, Define'n Old"

Greetings to ever one in western Illinois and all readers of The Quill.

I'm a hope'n ever one enjoyed the celebration of Easter with family, friends or both includ'n a nice Easter service at church and delicious meal afterwards.

The Art

Collector's Wife.

A New York attorney represent'n a wealthy art collector called and asked ta speak ta his client. "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news fer ya"

The art collector replied. "I've had an awful day; let's hear the good news first."

The lawyer then said, "well I met with your wife today and she informed me that she invested $5,000 in two pictures that she thinks will bring a minimum of $15 - 20 million. I've seen them and I think she could be right."

Saul replied enthusiastically, " Well done! My wife is a brilliant businesswoman! You've just made my day. Now I know I can handle the bad news. What is it?"

The lawyer replied, "The pictures are of you and your secretary."

Come'n To An End

But then, "All things must come to an end".

That proverb dates back ta approximately 1374, by Chaucer. It was first used in the United States around 1680.

The word "good" was added much later. Thus we frequently hear "All Good Things must come to An End."

I don't lay claim to this column fall'n into the category of "Good", by any means, but I do know "Everything has an end", even the wisdom of Barnyard Bruke someday.

It seems this winter has provided funerals fer one to three friends and acquaintances every week thus far. Some were expected and others were complete surprises.

Some were young and others were well advanced in age. Non the less it is sad to experience their passing.

It has been said "The only way to really be happy in life is to be true ta who you are, and what ya value in life.

Ya need to stay strong and be loyal ta yourself, and make your antagonists wonder that after all they dish out you're still stand'n and smile'n.

Ta be yourself in a world that is constantly try'n ta make ya into something else is truly a great accomplishment!

A Good Reminder

Have'n touched on lose'n friends this winter, here is a timely reminder I have written about before but it's worth repeat'n if it'll save a life:

Ya are alone, tired, upset and frustrated. It's been an unsually hard day. Suddenly ya start ta experience severe pain in your chest that starts ta drag out into your arm and up in ta your jaw.

Ya are not to far from your local hospital, but unfortunately ya don't know if'n ya will be able ta make it that far. No one is nearby to perform CPR for you. So what do ya do?

Many folks are alone when they suffer a heart attack.

The person whose heart is beat'n improperly, who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds or so left before losing consciousness.

You can help yourself by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when produce'n sputum from deep inside the chest.

A breath and a cough must be repeated about ever two seconds without let up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt ta be beating normally again.

Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulate'n.

The squeeze'n pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way heart attack victims can get ta a hospital.

Ya might think this is silly but if'n it saves one of your loved ones life or your own it won't seem so silly.

Define'n Old

Mrs. Bruke asked me the other day if'n she thought we could be called "old", see'n as how so many in our age group are pass'n on. So, I looked up the follow'n definition of old:

• A 104 year old man was asked what was the best thing about be'n 104. He replied "No peer pressure."
• One feller was lament'n that he had sure gotten old! He had outlived his feet and his teeth. He had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes.

He seemed half blind, couldn't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, takes 40 different medications that make him dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.

Has bouts with dementia and shaves his ears regularly. He has poor circulation and can hardly feel his hands and feet anymore.

He can't remember if'n he's 85 or 92. He has lost all of his friends but, thank goodness he still has his driver's license!

• Ya know ya are old when half the stuff in your grocery cart sez, "for fast relief".
• As ya grow older ya prevent sagging by simply eat'n till the wrinkles fill out.
• One older lady complained that as her body became totally out of shape, she got permission from her doctor to join a fitness club and start exercise'n.

She decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.

She bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired fer an hour. By the time she got her leotards on, the class was over.

Well, there ya has it then on grow'n older. Grow'n older is the inevitable result of not die'n.

As this age'n process takes place, ya needs ta allow yourself a little humor or you'll be take'n life way too seriously to enjoy it.

Oh, and with April 1st come'n Friday, don't be fooled.

Hope'n ta see ya in church this week.

Remember, wherever ya is, whatever ya be a do'n, "BE A GOOD ONE!"

Keep on Smile'n,

Catch ya later,

BARNYARD BRUKE