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The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "Home Schooling, The Good Ole Days"

Greetings to ever one in western Illinois and all readers of The Quill.

Over one half of January is over already. They say on the average the worst of winter is over. Maybe so, but I can remember some tough winters in the past that showed up from here through March. We'll just have to wait and see what happens from here on out.

Home School'n

There is several folk that are now home school'n their children. It's really not so new if'n ya gives it a little thought. Fer most of the generation 60 years and older, they were to a degree home schooled. Here is how one feller explained it to me as ta how he was "HOME SCHOOLED" in so many ways:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.  "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that it will come out of the carpet."

3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My father taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My father taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me to be a CONTORTIONIST. "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it from your father when he gets home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If your don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My father taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22: My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you, do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My father taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

26. My mother taught me GRATEFULNESS. "Clean up your plate, there are millions of children in China starv'in."

The Good Ole Days

Fer those of youn's over 60, you probably have experienced some of this home school'n. If'n ya are over 60 maybe ya can relate ta some of these additional facts given ta me by another old timer:

Mom used to cut chicken, chip eggs, and spread butter on bread on the same cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get food poisoning.

Our school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper paper in a brown paper bag, not in ice pack coolers, but I can't remember getting e.Coli.

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the lake or at the beach instead of a pristine pool (talk about boring), no beach closures then.

We all took PE...And risked permanent injury with a pair of Dunlop sandshoes instead of having cross-training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built in light reflectors that cost as much as a small car. I can't recall any injuries but they must have happened because they tell us how much safer we are now.

We got the cane for doing something wrong at school, they used to call it discipline yet we all grew up to accept the rules and to honor and respect those older than us.

We had 50 kids in our class and we all learned to read and write, do math and spell almost all the words needed to write a grammatically correct letter...., FUNNY THAT!!

We all said prayers in school irrespective of our religion, and the national anthem and no one got upset.

Staying in detention after school caught all sorts of negative attention we wish we hadn't got.

We thought that we was supposed to accomplish something before we were allowed to be proud of ourselves.

It's hard to recall how bored we were without computers, Play Station, Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital TV cable stations. We weren't!! We went outside and found our friends and used our imagination to create something fun, and no referees!

Oh yeah.. And where was the antibiotics and sterilization kit when we got that bee sting? We could have been killed!

We played "King of the Hill" on piles of gravel left on vacant building sites and when we got hurt, mom pulled out the 2/6p bottle of iodine and then we got our backside spanked. Now it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10 day dose of antibiotics and then mom calls the lawyer to sue the contractor for leaving a horribly vicious pile of gravel where it was such a threat.

To top it off, not a single person we knew had ever been told that they were from a dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have known that?

We never needed to get into group therapy and/or anger management classes. We were obviously so duped by so many societal ills, that we didn't even notice that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac!

How did we ever survive?

There ya have it then, just as it was given ta me. Both these Old Timers express gratitude in have'n shared that earlier era, and express sorrow fer those who didn't because of what they missed. Those old fellers that shared these thoughts and memories say they wouldn't trade them for anything! Life's most simple pleasures quite often are the very best.

Hope'n ta see ya in church this week and pass along joy to all ya meet along life's journey.

Remember, wherever ya is, whatever ya be a do'n, "BE A GOOD ONE!"

Keep on Smile'n,

Catch ya later,