The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.
Greetings to ever one in western Illinois and all readers of The Quill.
This week, Wednesday April 22, is Earth Day. I'm a hope'n ever one had a good Earth Day.
A lot of planting went on last week and folk seem satisfied with the progress of their field work. It shore seems a mighty fast pace compared ta when we used ta utilize two row planters and check wire. I guess life in general is a faster pace compared ta years ago.
The rain over the weekend was welcome but some was worried early on when they missed the rain on the first front that came thru.
IL. Declares War On USA
The boys was talk'n the other day of Illinois declare'n war on the USA. The stories goes as follows:
President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang.
"Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented Midwestern voice said. "This is Bruce, down here at Wubbens Bar and Grill in western Illinois. I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on ya'll!"
"Well Bruce," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Bruce, after a moments calculation, "There is myself, my cousin Harold, my next-door-neighbor Randy, and the whole dart team from Wubben's. That makes eight!"
Barack paused, "I must tell you Bruce that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Bruce. "I'll have ta call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Bruce called again. "Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Bruce?" Barack asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Rusty's farm tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Bruce, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Lord above", said Bruce, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Bruce rang again the next day..."President Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harold's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the VFW have joined us as well!"
Barack was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you Bruce that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, "I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Oh Lord," said Bruce, "I'll have to call you back."
Sure enough, Bruce called again the next day. "President Obama! I'm sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
Well sir," said Bruce, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over a few beers, and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed two million prisoners."
ILLINOIS CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
Did you ever wonder how some folk seem ta get along better with people whilst, others seem ta struggle? Norman Vincent Peale gave the follow'n advice on "Hows To Get Along With People":
There ya has it then. I started this column by talk'n about plant'n. We know springtime is plant'n time so heres a poem entitled "A Garden". I'm a hope'n you will enjoy it:
First, let's have five rows of peas - Preparedness, Politeness, Promptness, Perseverance and Prayer.
Next, let's have three rows of squash - Squash gossip, squash criticism, squash indifference.
Then let's have four rows of lettuce - Let us be faithful, let us be unselfish, let us be loyal and truthful, let us love one another.
No garden is complete without Turnips - Turn up for church regularly, turn up with a smile every day, turn up with real determination.
Note: A garden like this could prove very faithful. Let's plant, cultivate, love, nurture and harvest it.
- Author Unknown
Hope'n ta see you'ns all in church this week.
Have a safe joy filled week fer you and your family.
Where ever ya is, what ever ya be a do'n "BE A GOOD ONE"!
Keep on Smile'n.
Catch ya later