The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.

The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "Spring hailstorms, st. patrick's day and burglars."

Greetings to everyone in western Illinois. I'm a hope'n ya all remembered to turn your clocks forward properly last weekend and have adjusted to the new time by now.

Guess what? The first day of spring is next Tuesday, March 20. It shore seems we had us a short winter this time around as opposed to fast winter when the snow came so frequently. St. Patricks Day is next Saturday and what better time is there than on that day to find a good supply of cornbeef and cabbage. Ummm, ummm, ummm, I just love it. The only thing better would be sauerkraut and wieners!

With spring come'n round the corner I'm reminded that "despite man's sophistication and artistic accomplishments, he still owes his very existence to six inches of topsoil and the fact it rains. Thank goodness for the farmers and their diligence in our community.

I once knew of two men who farmed across the way from each other. Jim was an atheist and Hank was a believer. Whenever they gathered together Jim was exceedingly aggressive at complaining and Hank was joyful and thankful.

A hailstorm came thru one August afternoon and destroyed most of Hank's corn and soybeans. It did not touch Jim's crops. He remained unscathed and received the benefit of the refresh'n rain his crops needed late that dry August". Yet, he complained he could have used more.

When they next met, Hank was smile'n and seemed to be in a contented mood. Ole Jim was shocked and bewildered. In fact he was prepared to do a parcel of complain'n on Hanks behalf. In his confused state Jim asked Hank "what have ya to be happy about? The hail all but ruined all your crops".

Well, Ole Hank straightened up, right smart as best he could, inspite of his bent over body from years of hard farm work and advanced stages of arthritis and replied, "The crops I planted belonged to the Lord. If'n he wanted hail on his crops, it's really none of my business. Who am I to question his management".

His attitude brings to mind an old statement me paw taught us boys years ago. He drilled into our minds that "It is not the greatness of our troubles, but the littleness of our spirit that makes us complain". I reckon this day and age it's a good piece of advice to keep forward in our mind set.

Sandy Bob shared with us boys the other day, "How to call the police when ya are old and don't move fast anymore". It was most fitt'n it seems fer all of us fellers gett'n along in years.

George Phillips, an elderly retired farmer live'n in the "Big City", was go'in up to bed, when his wife, Bertha, told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window.

George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but he saw that there were burglar hooligans in the shed load'n up and steal'n things. He quickly grabbed his cell phone and called the police. The dispatcher asked, "Is someone in your house?"

He urgently responded, "No", "but some fellers of mean look'n character are a break'n into my garden shed and cart'n off my valuable tools".

The police dispatcher casually responded, "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available". George replied "Okay". He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the police again.

"Hello", he said,"I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now. because I just shot two of them with my ole 10 gauge double barrel shotgun and killed em both, the dogs are eat'n on them right now," and he hung up.

Within five minutes, six police cars, a SWAT team, a helicopter, two fire trucks, a paramedic, an ambulance and an armed officer on a high speed Kawasaki 4-wheeler, with an assault weapon strapped across the front loaded down with "00" buckshot and tear gas canisters, showed up at the Philips' residence. They immediately caught the shocked burglars red-handed. One burglar complained to the other that he was informed that police normally were slow to respond in that neighborhood and as a result, criminals were successful many times in the past.

One of the policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!" George replied, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

Sandy Bob claims this is a true story. Well, true or not, I guess the moral of the story is, "Don't mess with old people"! Especially if'n they is retired farmer folk.

I'm gonna have to dwell on the whole matter fer a spell. In the meantime I'll share a bit of wisdom with youn's from Oscar Wilde:

"Imagination is a quality given a man to compensate him for what he is not. A sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is."

Take it easy on St. Patrick's Day and keep in mind that it was his faith in God and Jesus Christ that made him famous."Worship is one thing, and entertainment is another. It is dangerous business to play lightly with holy things, to tickle the senses in place of calling men to bend their knees and bow their heads in faith and repentance".

See ya in church next Sunday and bring a neighbor or kin some joy throughout the week by a personal visit or phone call. It'll brighten the day for both of you'ns. If'n not, we'll shore enough think it should have.I'm a hope'n everyone has a good week a come'n up.

Keep on Smile'n

Catch ya later

Barnyard Bruke