The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.
The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "Common Sense Prudence-Learned the Hard
Greetings to everyone in western Illinois.
I'm a hope'n all the young'ns enjoyed the snow we received last week.
I'm also a hope'n all the parents and older folk relished watch'n the young folk delight in the snow.
If'n you are beyond the temperament of experience'n the "great outdoors", with all of it's variety and changes, and don't want to or are unable to join in with those who do-then relax and delight in the fun of those who do.
It'll make life more enterest'n for everyone!
A good man in his 50's was on his way to a planter clinic last Thursday, in all that snow and wind. His truck flipped over and he lost his life.
I reckon what he had planned for Friday and this past weekend will be left undone. It's a sad event and his family could use your prayers and a sympathy card. Might ease the pain a bit.
In the meantime, drive carefully-for your family and friends sake, if'n for no other reason.
Last week, memories from the farm and important learned lessons were shared with you'ns from years ago.
I'm a hope'n it will be useful for everyone if'n a few more memories and wisdom is shared.
Here we go:
- If'n you are 15 and never chewed before, don't try load'n hay or pitch'n bundles after accept'n the "man" challenge! You might be able to drive the team of horses or tractor, but don't try stand'n up steady. Let the feller who coaxed ya into try'n your first chew, do the work ya were gonna do before ya got plum dizzy from that first plug a tobacco.
- If'n there is only one jug of water on the baler or in the haymound, try and get your drink first ahead of your tobacco chew'n help mates.
- Even though ya has tied twine around your pant legs whilst shelling ear corn out of a crib, your life is still in danger when those with pick or shovel in hand start swing'n to kill the scamper'n rats.
- If'n you don't' have twine tied around your pant legs, whilst shell'n ear corn within the confinement of a crib, and a rat runs up inside your pant leg to escape swing'n shovels and a pick, you'll learn a new dance-guaranteed!
- Rats inside your left pant leg do not die if'n your friend with the shovel whacks ya on the right leg.
- Don't let your rat hate'n farm dog go after a rat up your pant leg.
- Skunks can spray when face'n ya. Further than ya thinks.
- To get rid of skunk odor from yourself or dog mix 1 quart 3% hydrogen peroxide with 1/2 cup bake'n soda. Include 3 teaspoons liquid dish soap. Let it work liberally and then apply to the affected areas. Don't get it in the eyes. Rinse with water. Don't premix ahead of time as it really bubbles and makes a mess.
- Corn cob fights are fun until your brother forgets to duck and catches one in the eye. No, he's not blind, but that peach switch applied to the rump by your father feels as if he were!
- Don't kick ant mounds with your bare feet.
- Don't kick ant mounds with your shoes on.
- Just don't kick ant mounds at all especially if'n they are fire ants.
- Don't knock a hornets nest off the eave of a barn to see what they'll do. Especially if'n your not a fast runner!
- Don't mess with a hornets nest at any time even if'n ya are a fast runner!
- Treat hornet nest stings quickly, after you have learned why ya don't want to disturb a hornets nest.
- Electric fence wire can be set both high, for sows and boars, and low for piglets. Don't pee on the lower wire. It will be your first lesson in gymnastics and in do'n the backward flip. You could land in a hog
- Don't allow your older brother to talk ya into test'n the International weed chopper old style powerful electric fence charger by place'n a blade of grass on the hot wire and hold'n it there. You'll learn additional gymnastic tricks.
- Don't get betwixt a mean cow and her new born calf. Hang loose whilst mean cows massage ya to the ground! (It breaks less bones)
- Don't keep mean cows around with horns. There massage'n techniques can be aggressive!
- After you've picked up a piglet for inspection, or to give a shot, and whilst it is squeal'n loud enough to deaf'n your ears, remain stand'n after the mother sow catches up with ya. She can't turn her neck to bite ya. If'n she gets ya down, treat your wounds quickly to prevent infection!
- Don't run lengthways to the pasture fence when a bull is chasen ya.
- Run'n lengthway to the pasture fence when a bull is chasen ya is unproductive and no fun!
- Wash the white off the mulberries before eat'n em.
- Don't shoot your shot gun with snow inadvertantly stuck in the barrel.
- Don't touch a spark plug end with the engine runn'n, unless of course ya has a yearn'n to fear additional gymnastic stunts that you'll never want to repeat!
- And of course, don't put your tongue on the pump handle in the wintertime.
There is more wisdom to share with you'ns, from personal experience, but one hesitates to give you'ns more than ya can absorb at one sett'n!
Have a good week, a come'n up, and remain light hearted. It's good for your health! See ya in church Sunday.
Keep on Smile'n
Catch ya Later