The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.

The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "White Breasted chickadoos don't mix with new carpet"

Greetings to everyone in western Illinois.

Here we are starting a new year (2010) and a new decade (2010). What say ye we try and make em both good ones.

Will Rogers once said, "Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save".

Let's be careful this new decade to not fall into that endless trap.

Walt Whitman is quoted as having said, "I have sometimes doubted whether there could be a great race without the handy influence of winters in due proportion".

Try keeping that thought in mind as you go out to start your vehicle in the sub zero weather we have been having this week and last.

Your existence in this winter cold is helping to build a, "Great race!"

I suppose that is also the reason, by Whitman's calculations, that it is often stated that southern California contains so many "screw balls." There's no winter to enhance their greatness.

Cornelius came over for another of his regular visits and shared his thoughts with me.

It seems one cold early morning a, "white breasted chickadee" had hit his window and lay dizzy and stunned in the snow.

Old Cornelius found the poor little feathered critter and brought it into the warmth of his home to nurture it.

As far as I know there is no such a nomenclature for a bird as a "white breasted chickadee."

I'm a thinkin' he had it confused with a "house finch".

Anyways, he should have told his wife it was so, because she didn't want any "white breasted chickadee" runnin', or flyin', or for that matter recoverin' in her house. Especially, since she had just installed new carpet after long awaited patience.

She conjured up that it probably would do its bird thing on her new speckled carpet and she was plan'n on have'n women folk over for company.

Cornelius obliged his wife, to her chagrin, by placin' the bird in his hat and coverin' the hat with the Hawk Eye newspaper.

Mrs. Farkwad didn't like it one bit, but begrudgingly accepted the situation see'n as how Cornelius said he would release it as soon as breakfast was over. By then the bird should be recovered.

Poor ole Cornelius. His big mistake was ask'n his wife if'n she had turned the bird outdoors, after he found his hat birdless.

I guess it was not good-her reaction to the fact her house was newly carpeted for a bird.

To date the bird continues to enjoy its freedom and Cornelius can be expected a regular visitor off site, probably at my house, until the bird is caught. I'm expectin' some interest'n winter socialization with that ostracized man until he captures his prey.

It seems one of the neighbors, Blow Jo Knowitall, got a call from someone try'n to steal his identify. She carried a southern accent and represented herself as being from the census bureau.

Ole Blow Joe was not to be fooled, however, and told her so. In fact, he boldly told her she should be ashamed of herself trying to scam such as that, an innocent farm folk, such as himself.

He even told her with her accent he was sure she was from another country such as Iraq or Iran.

By this time, the fair lady went livid and threatened him with severe punishment such as a big fine or what not, to which Blow Jo sez,

"Say as you will but if'n you was from the Census Bureau you would be a neighbor hireling knockin' on my door and I would oblige you."

Then he hung up on her, seein' as somehow she had already discovered his telephone number.

Well, I'll keep you posted if'n Blow Joe gets away with put'n off the Census Bureau in this manner. Or, worse yet, if'n his identify gets stolen.

I guarantee you this-most of us will recognize ole Bow Joe even if'n his identify is stolen.

I heard talk in the local restaurant that the firemen were out Sunday evening in the bitter cold, below zero weather fightin a house fire in Terre Haute.

I hear no one was hurt, which is the most important thing when it comes down to it. Houses and garages, and buildings and what's in them can be replaced.

We all need to give special thanks for those fire fighters and all the trainin' they do just to keep us safe.

We call all sleep better knowing they are just a phone call away if'n we ever need them. Be sure to thank "em, and check those smoke alarms.

Keep on Smile'n

Catch ya later

Barnyard Bruke